On Monday (it's Thursday 29th today) I took a bus to Olkhon Island. A bit of background to the island and Lake Baikal - it is the deepest lake in the world at 6 or 7 kilometres deep and can fit all the water from the North American lakes in it, its 363 miles long and up to in places 100km wide - it's the size of Belgium. Olkhon island sits midway up the lake and is thought to be one of only a few true centres of shamanism across the world (don't ask me why). The place is truly incredible. Read more about it here http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lake_Baikal

The minibus took 8 hours. The driver reminded me of a fat Ray Leotta (but was Russian). He was on acid or something similar. Driving like a MANIAC on roads made of sand. A few things about Russian roads - most are massive, almost always badly tarmac'd, and if they are not either they are made of sand and pebbles (the size of your fist giving the suspension enough of a bang to send shockwaves to the top of your head). So Ray drove us through some beautiful countryside - trees, grassy plains and desert. We stopped twice - once for a toilet and lunch break (the toilet was something else - think group squatting and me an English lady trying not to look at the fat Russian next to me taking a dump), and once to cross to the island by ferry. I swear my neck will never be the same again - on one particular bump my spinal cord compressed to the size of a thimble and no mistaking.

On board our "Danger Bus" I met Vivian and Christian - a Danish couple. Very lovely. Got to Nikita's Homestay where I was staying - it's run by Nikita an ex-table tennis world champion (I saw him in the bar and wasn't that impressed to be honest). It's an excellent place though and just by the beach - it's a cross between a commune and a, well, commune really. The food is included in the price which equals 3 meals a day! Can you believe it!? Fatty Willoughby is back! The above pictures are Vivian, Christian, my room and a guy who every morning woke me up without fail barking his head off. I quite liked his little house though and if you look in the picture of my room you can see him quite clearly.

It's cold enough to be Ireland and yet everyone speaks Russian. Truely beautiful sights. And it's raining, so I get to wear all my warm clothes which I am loving.

So I just spent my time seeing some of the island - including an old soviet airport, a burnt down gulag and the beautiful coast. It was also my first opportunity to horse ride and it was really the right place to do it. I was on a bus with some French people and Vivian and Christian - I heard a fantastic thing from the French though "you know the French population is the second most important population in London". I almost spat my soup over her but said nothing.

Saw loads of wildlife including some ground squirrel things - Vanessa will know what I am talking about - yes they are the very same my dear. So all in all a good time (apart from that I got stung by, not only a bee but a bumble bee whilst sun bathing, the little shite - I thought they were nice?).

Off to Listvyanka tomorrow to try some diving in the Lake. It's going to be cold and I'll probably come out after 5 minutes but I've got to give it a try.

Yekaterinburg to Irkutsk

Ahh thank god the longest journey is over. It was tough. 3 days of not talking to anyone (in carriage with fattties on tour) was a challenge which I won (but struggled with the entire time). Ate little, slept little and spoke little. Ian is pictured here with a waving crab crisp which I bought from the restaurant wagon - they really are quite something not only for their hand waving abilities.

Took some snaps of the countryside going by as well as some videos which I can't put on here yet as the connection is too slow. Points of note about the journey - Russian men like going topless like Brits abroad especially the fat ones, saw some men selling furry hats (didn't buy one Alison, sorry), all Russians smoke, ear plugs are essential along with speaking Russian for a tour like this, there are no foreigners in second class, drinking on your own while not talking for 3 days is very dangerous for ones soul, fog rules.

So got to Irkutsk proper today - which is a very pretty city, much much nicer than Yekaterinburg. I walked from the train station to the hostel this morning, and it was lovely to be out in the fresh air after the last few days. The hostel is nice and I met Femke who I had met in Yekaterinburg, we hung out with an Italian for the day (I can't remember his name), basically just walking around the city. Saw some more bloody churches but nothing of note happened apart from us coming across a gathering of sailors celebrating something, what? we were never quite sure of. Had a bloody good Mongolian meal tonight and feel much better for it.

Am off to Olkhon Island tomorrow (in Lake Baikal) on the bus (another 8 hour trip) but not sure I will get internet access, so will update when I can. 

Ural environs

Today I went out into the Ural countryside - I was led to believe it would be a good few hours of hiking/trekking/strenuous activity with a BBQ lunch but I was duped - it's now only 2-1 to McPoops versus Russia. It's catching up..... I will triumph though.

We went in a car with a driver, and guide - the skinniest man I have seen in Russia - about 1 hour out of the city. There were 3 of us, myself and a German Swiss couple (very nice). It's basically forest, forest and more forest - which is very lovely I have to say. But in terms of "strenuousness" I'm now not sure what Russians mean when they say that. If strenuous means walking on a flat path with no uphill walking and not breaking a sweat then yes they were honest but our definition is completely different to theirs. There were no ticks. Yippee!

We walked for a while and came across this talc mine (did you know they used to use Asbestos in talc? see all the stories have links!). They have stopped mining there and have flooded the old mine - the water was so clear you could everything in the bottom of it. The guide was trying to explain to us about the mine when a group of campers all started hyperventilating together - like lunatics. He explained that cults came here to cleanse the spirit and this "hyperventilating" cleansed the mind and gave you a spiritual closeness to your surroundings. My fat arse (not as fat as it was when it left the UK 2 weeks ago I hasten to add). It just deprives your brain of oxygen, and the sudden loss of so many brain cells means you can't think properly. They were so annoying.

Bear in mind I paid 50 of your English pounds, but after 1 hour of walking and lunch (cheese slices, satsumas, tomatoes, and cucumber - I am not kidding. Now I understand why the guide is so thin) we headed back to the car and subsequently left and headed back to Yekaterinburg. When we reached the Swiss couples hotel the guy mentioned tipping to them. I almost cracked him around the head but of course being Swiss they obliged. The driver (who reminded me of Mike massively - spoke nearly all the time with a fag hanging out his mouth) said he wouldn't accept tips because of his religion...? eh? Anyway, I then said I wanted a lift to the station, and they looked surprised but I got to the station and then the driver wanted to carry my bag wherever I went (which was nice - thanks Mike). The other guy looked expectantly at me, and I just said thanks and walked off. I hate that feeling of getting ripped off knowing you can't do anything about it, so there was so no way I was going voluntarily give this guy any more cash. The driver (Antoli a.k.a Mike) took me to a cafe and bought me a little memento of Yekaterinburg (a statue of the european/asian border marker), and also gave me his card saying if I come back his own tour company is better and they do more exciting things. So if any of you are in Yekaterinburg in the future let me know and I'll find his card!

So I'm now sat in the cafe waiting for the train which is due to come in about 5 hours from now. I was so hungry after my "lunch" I went to the counter of the cafe (like a cafeteria) and pointed at the grey slop and mashed potato - for only £1 who could argue after such an extravagant day? Turns out it was liver - ugg, ugg and ugg. So yes £1 was too much in the end. Back to the crisps and beer. So today has generally, I would say, not been the greatest of days. Please God let Irkutsk be better and the diving I have booked actually be in Lake Baikal and not a paddling pool.

See you in Siberia! Pa-ka!

CHRIST - I nearly forgot, I left the hostel this morning quite early and was sat waiting for the car to pick me up. I was going through in my head all my stuff to make sure I had everything - wallet, passport, tickets, registration, hmmm what else? Ian? IAN? I had forgotten Ian. What do I do? Wake up the owner to say "I've left my teddy?" - I did. Ian was very cross when I found him (in the inside of my duvet cover - I fell asleep with him in my hand last night) and is not speaking to me again. Phew though! You can't imagine the panic and  heart palpitations I had when I remembered him. It was like Wilson all over again.

Yekaterinburg - I can "tick" the 2 week mark

God I am knackered. Spent last night worrying myself to sleep after I discovered the Ural mountains (and Yekaterinburg) are the tick capital of Russia.... ticks as in the things that bite you and give you tick-borne encephalitis. So even though I am looking forward to seeing the countryside tomorrow, I am freaking out about the ticks. Stupidly I found a research paper written by Defra and the HPA (not that I would believe anything written by these muppets) describing tick prevalence in Siberia etc etc. Very interesting but quite disturbing. 


ANYWAY, back to today. Still in Yekaterinburg (it rained today) but it is a quiet city even though it has shed loads of people living in it. So some background. The city sits between the north and south Ural mountains, and the verified border between Europe and Asia sits about 17km away. You can't get there on the train, and would have to pay a taxi to take you there or organise a tour - min. £70, so I didn't bother. The city was founded in 1723 as a way for Peter the Great (remember him from St Petersburg) to extract the riches from the Ural mountains (oh and how beautiful those riches are - will describe more about them later). Named after 2 Catherines - Peter's wife and Russia's patron saint of mining, in WWII it was an industrial centre (and then called Sverdlovsk) and actually remained closed to outsiders until 1990 as it had a lot of nuclear stuff going on. Probably most famously it is where the Bolsheviks (linked to Lenin) murdered Tsar Nicholas II and his family in 1914. Only recently have they built a Church on the exact sight where the family were murdered (out where their bodies were concealed in the country the Orthodox Church has built a beautiful church and made the mine shaft sacred ground). It was only built in 2007 (I think?) so not massively impressed by it actually.

Another factet is that Boris Yeltsin studied as a civil engineer here in the 70s, rising to become the regional communist party boss. 


So that's about all I can muster on the history side. I decided a much more valuable way to spend my time this morning was trying to find some nail varnish remover. I had painted my toes before I left the UK and forgot to bring anything to remove it or any new varnish to paint them, so they looked utterly minging. So I successfully achieved this task and now have bright pink nails. Lovely. I thought you all should experience a Russian shopping Centre so I took a video but unfortunately the server for this blog is rubbish and you can't see it, unless someone can tell me how... i.e. its too big.

I also made my way to the Ural Geology Museum. Why? I'm not sure really. It cost me 50 rubules and looked like a good way to kill some time. In fact, it was awesome. It is found in the Mining University, you can recognise the University because of increasing number of rocks in the vicinity (see below):

Not thinking I would really be that impressed, I entered the first room (which I deemed the crystal room) and was blown away by the amount and size of the crystals in there. Unfortunately, I was not allowed to take photos. And was not able to steal any, as the lady followed right behind me the whole way around the museum. So I wrote some notes of what I saw, and these consisted of the following: rainbow of rocks, Big lumps of gold, zircon and crystal plates with stone hairs around the base (all colours), brain looking rock (cream), big rock pink inside black outside (beautiful), tree branch with crystals on it, fossils (all sorts), meteors (lots), lava and lava balls from the Russian volcano Koryakski on Kamchatka Peninsula,  Shuiskite, embreyite, crocit, rauquelinite, planetite, pyrophyllite. Tell me that wasn't informative. As I said above, this place sits between the Ural mountains which are called the "stone belt". The stuff in this place was amazing but I can't imagine what has happened to the landscape in order for all these minerals to be extracted..... what unfortunately will probably happen to Mongolia soon.


I had a very funny (dangerous maybe) experience - was checking out a plain looking large lump of rock that had horizontal lines, and vertical lines in it. I was like that's weird, the vertical lines looked like hairs. All the rocks are out on display i.e. no glass cases or anything, so I touch the side of this rock thinking its the cleaners duster fibres or something. Walked away, looked back and was astonished to see a sign above it in the display case saying "Asbest" - BOLLOCKS. So am I right to assume asbestos comes from rocks? and that it safe to be out on display, for innocents like myself to touch? I didn't touch the fibres, just the rock. It must only be toxic when disrupted or something. Oh well!


So then left the museum after about 2 hours of looking at the pretty things and was left alone for a minute so quickly snapped these two objects on the way out of the door - they were both quite big but not as great as the ones upstairs. I felt excited by the place because I know the geologists would have loved it but felt disappointed I couldn't gather more info for you guys. You'll just have to come and see it yourselves - Pete, write in to your fellowship for a trip to Yekaterinburg to see the crystals. It's essential to both your (and UCL's) research and personal development :) Katie, there are rocks from space - that's all NASA needs right? You could combine it with a trip to Moscow to see the doggies.

I then had a subway (which was soooo good) and went back to the hostel to do some washing. Met an English guy (21 year old studying Maths at Bath) - he wasn't interested in the rock stories so I left him to updating his trip itinerary on a spreadsheet. Geek alert! I know, I know.

So tomorrow am off to the country to get bitten by the death ticks, and then tomorrow night (22nd) getting on the train to Irkutsk (3 nights journey away). I arrive on 25th July. So wish me luck, and I'll update you when I can.

I spy with my little eye, something beginning with "I"........

Has anyone seen this?

Seriously Russia......http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-10695037

Kungur to Yekaterinburg

So I left Kungur yesterday after having patiently sat at the railway station for approximately 4 hours. Even thought the "moscow time" thing at the train stations would seem obvious when your tickets have the time you thought was moscow time as local time, it opens up a whole world of confusion.

So a number of interesting interactions occured whilst I was sat on the platform burning my face in the sun - including a drunk man running across the train tracks in front of a train with the police chasing him batons raised and a father burning his childs finger with a cigarette (what is it about Russians smoking near children? I have never heard a child scream as loudly). As it happens I also added to the melee, in that earlier I had bought a mobile telephone (as I have been so desperate to speak to someone, anyone over the last few days I thought now was the time to do it!) and called Simon immediately weeping when he answered. The Russians thought I was mental. Which was great because they left me alone. My number is +7 982 487 8223 - if anyone fancies texting or calling then do but please leave your name as I have no numbers!

Food wise yesterday the Stalagmit reached new heights of grimness and breakfast included a cold carrot/potato slice (almost like bubble but with no squeak or salt). So while at the train station I went to a cafe to buy a pie, which unusually just ended up with me having a staring match with the lady behind the counter (she would answer nothing I said in Russian and just kept staring at me with the most outrageously ugly look on her face).This, along with Kungur, sent me over the edge and before I knew it I was standing in this cafe smiling manically at this woman saying "you're a miserable person aren't you?" [please note terminology used here has been slightly modified for reasons of a parental nature] - obviously I didn't leave the establishment with any sort of food consumable but would have happily eaten my hat rather than go back in to that witch's lair. It takes all sorts I guess.

Safely got on the train, and was in carriage with a fat old Russian lady (no English) who when I explained I was English she immediately started offering me food (sausage, sausage and more sausage). Yet again the Train Russians come out on top - I think they are a special breed. Like the Littlest Hobo, always ready to help a fellow traveller ("there's a voice, that keeps on calling me, down the road that's where I'll always be, every stop I make, I make a new friend, can't stay for long, just turn around and I'm gone again. Maybe tomorrow I'll wanna settle down, until tomorrow I'll just keep moving on"). I loved that show. I'm going to sing it for the rest of the trip, maybe I will rename myself.

So I reached Yekaterinburg yesterday, and made it to my hostel - which isn't in the same league as the others I have stayed in but it has a bed and a shower which is all I need. I met another solo female traveller called Femke, a teacher from Holland - she was lovely and we went out for a beer but spent ages and ages looking for somewhere, in the end going to a place where we immediately got accosted by some drunk Russian men, so left. Femke left this morning, so I am back on my own.

I've spent today wandering around the city, trying to organise an excursion into the Ural countryside. What a faffage. It's done though and the day after tomorrow I will finally get to see some proper country. As for the rest of today and tomorrow, I am going to eat Pizza, look at some minerals and meteors, do some washing and drink at an Irish bar called Kilkenny's (only because that is Carol's name!). Sweet.

As an update, Ian has gone AWOL.

Kungur and the Ice cave - 18th

Having had quiet a sleepless night (not due to sweat as it's only 25 degrees here, just being over tired) woke to knocking on my bedroom door at 8am. The receptionist had rallied an English speaker to ask for my migration card and registration voucher from Moscow. So I decided to get up and venture to the cafe where I was to receive my free breakfast. There is a reason why it is free, because it means the bin men don't have to collect it. I like food, all food, there are not many food stuffs I don't like, and some things I thought I didn't like Simon has convinced me of even their delights (including dates). So when the most dower woman I have ever seen puts in front of me a cup of tea (nice) and a bowl of mashed potato, I thought my luck was in, although it wasn't mashed potato. I can only describe it as a mix between Smash (although I've never had it so am imagining what it tastes like), rice pudding, gravel, the driest cheese you can imagine and a dash of over used oil. You can imagine my enjoyment.

After this appetising delight, I headed off to the "Ice Cave". I had built it up in my mind for so long, I was very excited. And to be honest it didn't disappoint. It was massive (5km, with over 20km unexplored), and really cold - which was so nice as I finally got to use my boots and fleece! It was so dark I struggled to take any good pictures of the ice and the ones I do have don't do the cave any credit.

We were down there for so long (and I was at the back for godsake) I did start to get a bit spooked - images from The Descent came to mind and everytime I took a photo I'd imagine later when looking through them a picture of some beast or other peering around a rock.....aaarrrrggghhhh!

However, I am not sure I would advise anyone else to come all the way to this part of Russia just for the caves..... Afterwards I went for a stroll around the area, it really is beautiful and I can't imagine what the landscape looks like under 4 feet of snow as it usually is.

To be honest, I then couldn't be arsed doing anything else and went and sunbathed on my balcony (a.k.a death trap) to read my book and drink some beer, like a lonely old drunk (see view at midnight from the death trap and the security measures for the Complex). Apart from the rancid breakfast, there is nothing else to eat here, so have survived on a diet of crisps and tomatos, and beer.
Heading off to Yekaterinburg tomorrow and to be honest I can't say I will miss Kungur. As long as I can survive the breakfast and find the bus stop, god willing I should make it out of here alive. I need someone to talk to!

Kungur here I come - 17th July

Left Moscow on 16th from Kazansky station - talk about a nightmare. I had had the squits for a few days but of course the worst bout arrived whilst in transit to the station. When I finally get to the toilet in the station, it's one of those squat toilets, and there was no toilet paper (of course I'd had to pay 100 rubules to even enter the toilet). It was so rank, and I couldn't fit in the cubicle with my bag..... ugg, lucky for me I had my wet wipes (Simon chastised me before I left for taking them! more fool him!). Got to the train and again I'm with 2 Russian women who do not speak English (1 space left empty), so I was dreading the journey. By the way Mark, if you're reading, I have not met any foreigners on the trains - I'm not sure who you were talking to while inter railing but either they're hiding or that person was lying.

We left Moscow and I went to sleep, (some bloody Americans were up until 8am drinking in the hostel the night before). We arrive at the first stop and a guy comes into our carriage, speaking Russian. He's having the spare bed. I sit there and wish quietly to myself with all my heart that the guy speaks English. I am on the top bunk, and so is he so I help him with his bag. He speaks in Russian, I say "I do not speak Russian, English?". He says something in Russian, really disppointed I go back to reading my book not looking forward to the 24 hours ahead. About an hour later, he blurts out "where are you from?" in broken English, and so it began. His name was Alexei, he is a lawyer at the Vodka plant in Chelyabinsk. He was born at a city in the South Ural which used to be a secret city, as it had a massive nuclear plant during the cold war. It is closed now. He also used to work for the KGB - which was quite exciting. He was the nicest man I could have hoped to have met. We couldn't really communicate very well but we got by. He kept phoning a friend to get the right English, and invited me for a beer in the dining carriage (he told me the Russian toast is "Behind you!" whatever the fork that means..... a hangover from the cold war and the KGB? "Look out someone is about to stab you in the back as you drink vodka!"?). You know it's incredible how all Russians change from being intimidating (especially the guy with USSR tattoed on his knuckles) to welcoming and friendly once you're with a Russian (we knew that with Mikhail but I'm still surprised". I spoke to loads of people and they were all incredibly interested in me and my travels. There were no other English people on the train, I was like the freak in the freak show. Alexei bought us beer and whilst we chatted people came up and offered us food - the best was smoked fish from Baikal, the worst the tongue which had not been peeled - yuk! (I smiled and nodded). When I tried to pay, he kept telling me " you are guest of Rrrrussia". My opinion of Russians has entirely changed, I just wish I could speak more of it. The next day the two old ladies left and a new younger girl came in to the cabin. She spoke really good English and we had a great time all chatting with her as a translator.... they were so wonderful. I only wish I could have offered them something in exchange for their unlimited kindness.

In the hostels the limited people I have spoken to doing the trans-siberian all seem to be doing it as part of a tour (The Vodka Train is one of them - I could think of nothing worst). I've actually realised even though I get scared on my own and lonely sometimes, it's undoubtly the best way to do this trip because if I had been in a group I would never have spoken to Alexei or Natasha, and what a tradgedy that would have been.

So I arrived in Kungur on 17th, waving bye bye to Alexei and Natasha, and again I was on my own. However, I heard someone speaking Engligh and so immediately went up to them and asked them where Stalagmit was? He smiled and in very broken English, said he had just come from there, and thought for one moment and asked me whether he could give me a lift? My London side recoiled but I couldn't look a gift horse in the mouth and the thought of saying no, lugging my bag to the bus station, asking the bus driver for a ticket, was all too much and so I said yes. It was fine, he was lovely and I got to the infamous Stalagmit Tourist Complex. It's a proper shit hole. No one speaks English or even a hint of English, I spent 30 minutes at Reception trying to tell the woman what I did for a living - Scientist and government elicited laughing from all around me, I have no idea why, maybe Mike can enlighten me when I get back. Nice people though.

 The fabled Stalagmit Tourist Complex - it looks just as shit as in the advert doesn't it?

However, it is difficult here and I feel very lonely. Having been with Alexei and Natasha, and now being back on my own proper with no phone, no internet, no communication skills I feel a bit down. I also once again am without proper food. And I have really bad guts, so spent the afternoon laying on the bed in a room which was probably last decorated in 1950. There is a fridge and TV - so I have cold water and Russian telly. I watched Shanghai Noon in Russian and some other odd film with Richard Gere. I am a bit of a channel surfer so was watching two films at once but between them there was a full on porno Russian-styleee. And they say the youth of today are not affected by what is on TV! Ha what do they know? There are about 30 beer adverts in each break. I decided my favourite beer here is "Baltiker 7" - the series runs from 1-9 - 9 being the one with Vodka included in it! Horr-i-ble. I also watched the news where I saw a story about something (I dunno it was in Russian) but it was about a man who was being celebrated and there was a video of him accepting an award with a child in his arms, who he then offered the cigarette he was smoking to - can you imagine the outcry there would be if that was on UK TV? I then went for a walk and saw the entrance to the Ice Cave, and that cheered me up a bit! So will do that tomorrow, lets hope its worth it.

Before I left London, Simon gave me a letter to only be used in an emergency. Well, I caved today and opened it (and proceeded to weep like a baby). Thanks to everyone for reading the blog and especially to those who have left comments/emailed me, keeps me cheered and makes me feel a bit closer to home.
Sorry for the low key post, will try and pick things up again for the next one.

Moscow - day 9 - best day yet

As predicted, the Brazilians slept until midnight and only then went out - that was too much for my English constitution and so I left them to it. I'm not sure what time they got in but they left for their flight to Prague before I had got up. They did leave me with a very sweet note "To, you are fabulous. We loved meeting you. Send us a message on facebook, love, The Brazilian Gays". Now, I'm pretty sure these bad boys were not gay. I can't wait to tell them what their message said.

Today was a wicked day. After I desweated in the shower, I set off to pick up my remaining train tickets from an office on the outskirts of Moscow. The metro was in order so I went up to the lady and asked for 4 tickets (need one ticket each way), she understood and even smiled at me! Got to the office, and the lady there was sooooo nice to me I almost cried "cuddle me" and curled up on her lap. Lovely, lovely, lovely. It makes such a difference when someone is nice to you. Afterwards, I strolled gaily along the road, birds singing, sun shining, Emma waving at the passing motorists (see below). You've got to love Moscow!

I changed some dollars, as the visa charges are hiking up, and made my way to a very exciting destination. Some of you may wonder why I'd visit such a place, others of you will be in no doubt of the reason. This is for the geeks.

Can you guess what it is yet? No? You sure? Come on........

COME ON....... well, it's the Cosmonautics Museum of course! How did you not get that? Look how awesome the monument is? amazing. So I decided this was a good bet for two reasons (1) because it's awesome and (2) because its only £2 to get in. However, when I got there, I was told if I wanted to take any pictures I would have to pay an extra £9. Devastated but refusing to pay, I went in. What I saw astounded me, and risking my LIFE (and I mean my entire life) I secretly captured something I know at least one person I know will love (no guessing who)! I knew when I saw this, if I didn't capture this image I would be letting myself and this individual down. Please take a moment before viewing to appreciate the risk I took to get this image to you, here today.

Awesome. Awesome. Awesome. For those of you who do not know what it is you have just seen, these are the stuffed bodies of the two first dogs in space (say it with me" DDDDoooogggggsssss iiiiiinnnn sssspppaaaccceee"), Belka and Strelka. Don't ask me which one is which, for I cannot tell you. All was in Russian, and I was so excited at being soo bloody naughty I almost peed my pants. HAHAHAHAHA - yet again McPoops triumphs over the Russians! After the excitement died down, the museum was actually quite good and it was nice to get away to somewhere cheap and quiet (apart from the road). I bought an ice cream, and then a pie, and wandered in to this very odd place called the Russian Exhibition Centre. In Soviet times this was a place for the Russians to show off their wealth and capability. Now it's a place where Russians come to shop, go to the funfare, eat and drink - the exact opposite of what it was meant for. Weird.

To celebrate the success of the day, I bought 5 slices of watermelon for £3. It was so worth it. 

Tomorrow we're off to Kungur (arriving on 17th July), and to the well known Stalagmit Tourist Complex. It is unlikely that Stalagmit has something as up to date as the internet, so I will more than likely be back blogging in Yekaterinburg on the 19th. Ciao for now.

Moscow - day 8

Woke up quite late and headed off to the Kremlin with the Brazilian boys in tow. There is a breeze in Moscow and so the sweating is easing, thank the lord. Getting there was a nightmare.... the Brazilans are just so disorganised, we have to stop at least 20 times in a 1 mile journey, and then one of them had to go back to get his passport and so we left him and didn't see him again all day! Very nice guys though, friendly and easy going. I did feel a bit uneasy though when one of them stepped out this morning wearing a bright orange tank top... I don't think they can understand the notion of trying not to get noticed by the police. But actually did you know Brazil has a new pact with Russia, where neither inhabitants are required to get visas to each country? An odd relationship, methinks.

I am hating the Russian bureaucracy in Moscow. So many queues and different things you have to pay for... it's just awful. For instance, you pay 350 rubules (£8) to get in to the Kremlin, you pay 300 rubules (£7.50) to see the exhibitions, 700 rubules to see the Armoury (£16), extra to climb Ivan the Terrible's Bell Tower, extra for the Diamond Exhibition, and so it goes on. Needless to say, I didn't pay for anything other than the entrance.... I would love to have seen the Armoury but £25 is steep..... but if I did want to see it, I would have to come back out of the Kremlin, queue up again an hour before the 4 entrance times throughout the day open to get a ticket. Come on Russia, get with it. It's a joke. Plus I don't like the feeling of being frightened by the police.... maybe I'm a woos but they look so mean. So undemocratic. And the whole visa registration thing is such a scam! I knew it'd be like this but St Petersburg wasn't so I am a bit disappointed by Moscow.....You also have to go through security checks, and I got this "really funny" guard, wait till you hear this. I open my bag and he is like "you have guns? ha ha ha ha ha" in a deep Russian voice. I looked at him and didn't smile. He didn't say anything and let me through. HA UP YOURS RUSSIA! I got my own back you bastards. Oh how the mighty have fallen.

So the Kremlin has lots of Catherdrals in it, very beautiful structures with gold domes. They have amazing names , like the Assumption Catherdral, Annuciation Cathedral etc etc. These are places where Tsar's get buried and made Tsars...... Plus behind of all of these is where the Russian President lives sometimes - nice. The Kremlin has a massive history - Ivan the terrible reeked havoc from here, Napolean watched Moscow burn, Lenin fashioned the proletariat dictatorship, Stalin purged his people, Gorbachev began perestroika, and Yeltsin thought up new Russia. All very interesting but if you refuse to pay to see the exhibitions, you can't really get more details than that.

In the Kremlin also is the Tsar Bell and Tsar Gun - I don't know why the Bell is broekn (or who broke it? naughty), but when I saw the gun, I thought of Crocodile Dundee "that's not a knife, this, is a knife" - it's forking massive. I had an ice cream.

Then we left the Kremlin and went on to the Red Square, where we found Lenin's mausoleum and St Basil's Cathedral. Of course, this being Russia, Lenin's tomb is only open between 10am and 1pm, so I missed out on him (they have mummified him if you didn't already know that?). However, FACT; did you know that when Stalin died he was buried alongside Lenin, but the lady in charge at that time had a dream where Lenin told her he didn't want to be bedfellows with Stalin, so they had him removed, and he's now at the back of Lenin's tomb, where no one can see him! and FACT; Lenin wanted to buried beside his mother in St Petersburg but the government refused to let his wife take him there, and so he has been in Moscow ever since, with thousands of people walking past him every week. He went on holiday to Siberia during the war, which was nice.

So as I was sat on some steps in some shade (turns out I was by a loo - nice), a guy (1) comes and stands a short distance away by a wall. After about ten minutes, a guy (2) in a suit walks up to him, and guy 1 hands 2 a small plastic bag of something, which 2 takes, and then 1 and 2 secretly hand a piece of paper between them.... of course this can only be spy correspondence and not a son giving his dad his lunch, or something as banal as that. I was secretly quite excited. Then I got a sandwich and it was nice. I love bread, and miss it's glorious wonder.

Tonight I was supposed to be going out for a drink with the Brazilians..... they are currently asleep. I think their idea of going out is at midnight, back at 5am. Ugg, not my cup of tea. They told me earlier before they had ever met an English person they thought the English were cold. Shall I show them how cold an English person can be? No, I'll save that for another day.

As they say in Russia, Moscow!